How Much Do Teachers
Influence Popularity?
I had a jarring experience today. It’s my grandson’s sixth birthday, and my
husband and I went to have lunch with him at his school. Afterwards, we went out to the playground for
recess, and to spend a little more time with Luke. Of course, since he’s a rambunctious
just-turned six-year-old, we only caught glimpses of him in his blue-plaid
shirt as he raced around with his friends who’d just sung “Happy Birthday” to
him.
Suddenly I noticed a little girl by herself. She was a cutie with missing teeth, blond
hair and big blue eyes behind a pair of glasses, quite similar to ones I wore
when I was about her age. She smiled and
approached me. “Hi. I wanted to meet you.” I introduced myself and shook her hand. She told me her name was Isabella. Then she said, “Is the birthday boy your
grandson?”
When I told her that indeed, he was my grandson, she
said. “Could you introduce me to
him? I’d like to meet him.” (I marveled at her maturity. For a kindergartner, she was quite
articulate, and very polite.)
“Of course,” I said.
“I’ll go get him.”
But as I headed over to where Luke was playing, a teacher
called out to the little girl.
“Isabella, leave those people alone.
They’re here to spend time with their grandson, not talk to you!”
I was horrified.
Couldn’t quite believe it. “It’s
okay,” I said to the teacher. “She just
wants to meet my grandson.”
The teacher muttered something about how Isabella would talk
my head off, but I ignored her and went to find Luke. Bringing him over to where Isabella still
stood, I introduced them. Luke smiled
and said, “Hello.”
Isabella’s face brightened like a Christmas tree. “Would you like to play with me?” she asked.
But before Luke could get a chance to answer, the teacher
snapped, “Isabella, he’s playing with his own friends!”
I felt my heart drop.
I simply could not believe what she’d said. I looked at Isabella, expecting to see her
crushed expression, but you know what I saw?
I saw Luke smiling at her, and Isabella smiling back. The next thing I knew, they were off racing
around the playground.
But the whole thing made me wonder…do teachers have a hand
in determining who is popular and who will be a wallflower? All I know is…I saw something in that little girl,
Isabella. I saw myself…bespectacled, a
little shy, a bit of an outcast. And I
carried that with me for many years. I’m
not sure how it started, how I came to think of myself as not quite good
enough. I hope it wasn’t a teacher who,
with an offhand, inconsiderate remark, made me feel like that. But one thing is for sure. No one will ever make me feel like that
again.
As for Isabella, I have a feeling that she is going to be
just fine. Luke and she were still playing when we left the playground.
***
My local newspaper, The Carolina Forest Chronicle, did an
article on me and INCENSE & PEPPERMINTS for Veterans Day. Here’s a link to it:
For this week only, you can get INCENSE & PEPPERMINTS on
Kindle for only 99 cents.
http://www.amazon.com/Incense-Peppermints-Carole-Bellacera-ebook/dp/B00K1MSANG/ref=sr_1_3_twi_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1415392656&sr=1-3
2 comments:
That was heartbreaking, Carole. Both my kids have had social struggles and I wonder how much of what you just described happened in their schools. Good for you for writing this! Your grandson must have made you proud!
A lot, dear.
When I was in 7th grade...
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